37.5 Years

I am WAY TOO YOUNG for protruding nose hairs...That’s how long it took before I had to shave my face every day. Since I know guys that had to shave at 12, I refuse to believe this revelation marks me as a “grown up” — I sincerely hope that day never comes. 🙂

For the record, I hate shaving. I’ve never really liked it, and apart from a 12 year old boy wanting to be manly, I think I’ve always been perfectly happy with my baby face. But that’s all gone now.

If you aren’t a member of the Hairy Face Cleaving Society, there are basically 3 ways to go:

  1. Use a modern cartridge shaver. This is the route most folks go. The razors can range from pink with moisturizing strips, to 5 bladed steel jobs with a AA battery to provide vibration when face-scraping.
  2. Use an electric shaver. This is the method I currently use. I don’t use it because it offers a clean shave (it doesn’t), I don’t use it because it’s fast (it’s not), I use it because it seems to best hit both “sorta fast” and “notta lotta razor burn” — which is very important to me.
  3. Safety razor with 1940’s handle. This is truly the best method. No really. If you can lather up your pre-warmed face with a soap cake and badger brush, then slowly slide a double-edged razor blade over your throat — you will have the cleanest, razor-burn-freeish shave you’ve ever had.


A gift from Kyle. Or perhaps a death threat, I never considered that...


Truly, the third method is the best, and by far the cheapest. The only problem is that it takes a long time. It’s also difficult to get dressed and let out the dogs while shaving with a double-edged razor blade. Just sayin. Still, if you’ve ever wanted an amazing shave, follow the advice of my cooler-than-me friend Kyle, and try the old fashioned method. You won’t be sorry.

But you might be late for work. 🙂

4 thoughts on “37.5 Years”

  1. Been using a mug and brush for 30 years now but I’ve got to disagree about the razor. Cheapie, double-bladed bic razors shave close than old-fashioned double-edge blades and, my current favorite, is cheapie triple-bladed, store-brand (or Persona or Wilkinson) disposable razors. I switch to a new one every couple of weeks or so. Native American blood is a very good thing when it comes to body/facial hair. 🙂

    • I personally get a closer shave with the safety razor, but really the big advantage for me is the lack of razor burn. Cartridge razors turn my neck into hamburger, it’s really gross and painful. The safety razor doesn’t to that, but it takes SO LONG. Thus, a not-very-close shave with the electric razor. I tried buying a >$100 model to see if it would work better, but honestly it works about the same as the $39 I had years ago.

  2. I tried almost the same setup about a year ago,
    only I tried the straight blade handle with the same blades and soap.

    I used it for a few months and got good,
    the problem is that those derby blades have sharp corners.
    They aren’t rounded like real straight blades
    and don’t have protection like your handle does.
    So, the few times I cut myself, I really cut myself.

    I still have about 75 of the blades left,
    If you ever come down to Florida
    and want to hang out, they’re yours 🙂


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