Pharmaceutical Candies?

I took the red pill.  heheheThis time of year, I take lots of drugs. Allergy drugs, headache drugs, asthma drugs — lots and lots of medicines to stave off my genetically prescribed death. Lately, I’ve had lots of headaches, and so we had to purchase a new bottle of pain medicine. The problem is that these new pills are candy coated to make it more pleasant to swallow.

But they’re really tasty.

I’ve really never had a problem swallowing medicine. I can usually take a handful of chalky, pointy, enormous pills and get ’em down sans water. When you make the pills tasty, however, I end up flirting with the amount of time I can enjoy the sweet goodness before the candy coating is gone. My inner monologue usually goes like this:

“Mmmm… that’s yummy… Is that cherry? No, maybe just sweet. I think the red makes me assume cherry. It’s so tasty. I can’t quite put my finger on the flav— GAAAHHHHH!!! Burnt rubber! OMG, I’m gonna puke!~!!!”

And then I try to wash down the horrid flavor with coffee, toothpaste, or even attempt to rub the foul taste off with a dirty sock. It’s downright rancid, and I’m sure that’s the reason the tasty coating is there in the first place.

See? This is what it’s like to be me. Aren’t you glad you just get to read about it? 😀

7 thoughts on “Pharmaceutical Candies?”

  1. So, you know the problem: Treating medicine like candy isn’t a good idea.

    And, you know the solution: Don’t treat medicine like candy.

    Now we just have to work on that part of your mind that tastes *sweet* and suspends rational thought.

  2. Say to your doctor – “Doctor, I can not resist shiny, yummy things. Please only give me dull, icky medicine.” Then your doctor will correct the problem, and you’ll only have icky medicine.

    Having to take lots of drugs sucks. But it’s those drugs that help keep you alive. So it’s a good suckiness, ’cause we likes you alive. I bet your family feels that way, too, but even more so.

  3. Wild cherry and banana are the worst for me as well as I do the same thing on the very rare occasions that I force myself to take anything.


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